Paul Dini, one of the men responsible for Batman: The Animated Series, has a knack for angsty dude in pajamas (uhm, Batman).

With Dini’s work with Batman, he does not burden himself with the task of trying to do something new with the Caped Crusader. Batman is a constant. Dini’s work lets out an audible sigh as it acknowledges this, then surveys what there is to work with, rolls up its sleeves, and gets to business. What there is to work with is everything else, the city, the side characters, and the many cogs and pulleys that go into the machinery of the criminal world of Gotham.

This issue focuses on one of Dini’s newest characters and cog of the machinery, The Broker.

The Broker is such a fun, unique character but he would never be this cool if the book was so focused on stories where BATMAN MIGHT NOT SURVIVE THIS TIME (but then he does). The Broker is basically a morally ambiguous character who manages, buys, and sells all those rundown amusement parks, abandoned novelty toy warehouses, and giant greenhouses that Batman villains are so found of calling home. Though this issue is clearly the set up for a larger story involving Zsasz, and touches upon the even larger story involving the Dini-reinvigorated Hush, it stands alone as a solid story.

Which is another strength of Dini’s on this title. He manages to make every issue a satisfying story with a beginning and end while at the same time juggling multiple macro-plots. It looks like his time writing for TV’s multi-plotted Lost has paid off.

Dini can’t write Dick and Damien (the current Batman and Robin if you are out of the loop) as well as their main title’s author Grant Morrison, so it’s almost as if he doesn’t insult his readers by trying. While other books are using those characters and mucking up Morrison’s larger vision for Batman, Dini writes for Catwoman. Dini writes for Hush. Dini  writes for the increasing list of characters he created to fit snugly in the Batman Universe. It’s continuity done smartly and I want it to last forever.

Streets of Gotham is not going to change Batman. It actively fights against such changes in truth. What SOG is though, is the most consistent and fun Batman story you’ll find each month.

What I learned today: If you have the house to yourself do what comes naturally and lose the pants.

You are a spider. You spin webs. You eat bugs.

Spider's gonna squat in that empty mansion till a job turns up.

Not only is that the worst poem I have ever written to win a woman’s heart it is ALSO the entire game play of Spider: the Secret of Bryce Manor, a 2D adventure game that stars the creepy-crawlies.

The game’s challenge level is set very low. You, the spider, can climb around the perimeter of any object in the 28 rooms you find in an abandoned mansion. Tap anywhere on the screen to make him crawl or flick the spider to make him leap. The spider leaps to get to other parts of the room, attack certain bugs, and to spin web. By making a shape with your threads the spider produces webbing which will then catch any bugs it touches. Sounds simple enough, huh?

You do have to work with a limited number of threads (and running out results in a game over) which presents a small amount of difficulty but you always have more than you need.

That is the game play, simplistic, innovative, and.

Notice I didn’t say fun though?

While there is nothing unpleasant about these mechanics, I felt no real achievement as I progressed through the levels. It felt less like reading a book and more like flipping through a magazine: active but without substance.

Any shape will turn into webbing, as long as it is made by the thread.

The charm of this game comes from its setting. Bryce Manor is a wonderfully detailed local and the aesthetics of the game convey a chilly, forgotten mansion perfectly. As the spider you get to explore all the parts a human would overlook in the environment. Through this exploration you get clues as to what happened to the Bryce family.

Perhaps I’m stupid though. I know many people have figured out the dark secret, but I still don’t really know what’s up. I think I’m missing the middle of the Bryces’ story.

Going behind a crack in a drawer to find hidden documents, or abandoned wedding bands are the spooky moments that make this game work. There is a Metroid-like quality to these secrets. You can finish the whole game without uncovering them, but you are guaranteed to be disappointed in yourself when you realize what you missed.

The atmosphere of this game produces. The music and the way the application starts with the title screen over the game in progress are both calm and dreadful. It’s like a horror movie without the suspense. All the shots have been fired, but you didn’t hear any bangs. Spider’s message is clear: “Something horrible happened in this house but you’re in no rush, just eat bugs.”

Alongside the adventure there are other challenge modes to occupy your time. These are much more gamey with time limits and additional difficulty. I can see myself playing them for a couple more weeks. It will be pleasant to revisit the disrepair of Bryce Manor.

A clue! Clearly the family hated lockets. Nooow I get it...

This game COULD work as a “quick play” game. Auto-saving and challenge modes makes popping in and out of Spider simple for someone with only a few of minutes to spare but I feel like that’s not the best way to experience this title. Exploring every nook and cranny, taking in just what the environment is telling you, and feeling the weight of ghosts on your tiny spider frame can’t be done while waiting for an appointment.

It must be done on the toilet.

Spider currently stands as another great example of what makes the iPhone a compelling platform for gaming. Plus, since it was programmed by a bunch of ex-big-game-company employees wanting to do something new, it’s all the more reason for the industry to take heed of the iPhone and what tidings it brings.

What I learned today: If you keep your XBOX 360 controller attached to your computer all the time, it will get angry at you every time you lose at Minesweeper

Dangit.

I don’t want to do this.

I’ve spent the last several years raggin’ on the Marvel Ultimate Universe. I made fun of the laziness of it all, how all the characters and stories were already written and the writers were just retelling the same tales. I made fun of the context, how most of the stories were intereresting only by how they contrasted to the origials. I made fun of the futility, how what was supposed to be a way to get new readers on board with these characters turned into an extremely complicated new universe only comic book fans could appreciate.

But I can’t make fun of the rebooted Ultimate Comics.

Dangit.

Ultimate Comics Avengers so far has been a great step forward for Mark Millar. I feel like I’m watching the slow kid in class, the one who was only concerned with making comics to pitch to movie studios and craming tons of characters into every issue he wrote for Marvel, finally win that spelling bee.

Way to go kid. We always knew the magic was in you.

Ultimate Comics Avengers #2 focuses on the origin of Ultimate Red Skull, a villian reimagined brilliantly. There is almost nothing that relates him to his regular incarnation while at the same time he is certain to be Captain America’s greatest arch enemy. Bravo Millar! You get another gold star on your chart this month!

The art by Carlos Pachelo is like everything that man touches, pure comic book bliss. Weight and motion combine to make these characters feel powerful rather than suspended by wires.

Dangit.

I really didn’t want to like this series, but even with that it won me over big time, which I suppose is the best compliment I can give it. Don’t get left behind, pick up this issue and the last issue. You will be ok knowing next to nothing about the Ultiimate Marvel Universe, this is a fresh start.

Dang.

What I learned today: I could have gone my entire life thinking “Lady Gaga” was some kind of street drug instead of what I know now.

This story line was my first exposure to Proof, a mystery comic that stars Bigfoot.

(I love typing sentences that include the word “Bigfoot”, so this is kind of a dream come true right now. Please indulge me.)

As for the issue itself, the conclusion to a flashback of Proof’s (the name of the previously mentioned Bigfoot), it’s surprisingly touching. The tale is of Proof (Bigfoot) grieving and moving on from the death of Julia, the woman he loved.

Julia was a hair-covered woman of the P.T.-Barnum-freak-show variety. Naturally, she has a heart of gold. Plus, since she is hairy and Proof is hairy, there is a love connection.

This is why bears and moldy bread love each other as well.

Because of their similar physical features, Proof (Mr. Bigfoot) sees in her the only woman he could ever feel normal with. Her story is tragic though (revealed the issue before, I’m not spoiling anything here!) and Proof (the Bigfoot) never really got over it.

Hence: flashback.

And those last three pages… they got to me. Right here! In the ticker.

Since I am still new to this title I cannot speak on the overall tone of the series, but if the quality of this issue is a clue then I am anxious for next month’s.

What I learned today: Butternut Squash is the keep ingredient to all the most delicious of potions.