This week’s episode got me real excited about 24 again for two reasons. First reason? A prediction I made back in January came true! Just like all the wishes I ever made. Except this is a million times more important than “Peace on Earth” because it’s about TELEVISION.

Anyway, I was totally right, Chloe became the new Director of CTU. They’re saying it’s only until a replacement is found. Hah! With all the bad stuff that’s inevitably going to happen no replacement will be showing up.

Second reason? Ex-President Charles Logan is back. I remember thinking right before the episode started “Hey, I read somewhere Logan’s supposed to be in this season. Where is that goofball!?” Then the goofball showed up! What I am saying, is that I can predict the future. I am magic.

Anyway, Logan’s back because President Taylor needs help convincing the evil Russians to support the peace treaty this whole season has been about. Since Logan used-to-be/is-evil, he’s got plenty of friends in evil Russia and wants to use his knowledge to help get them back on board with Taylor’s treaty. She doesn’t trust him because he keeps making really sinister faces at her. This is different from the remorseful, bearded Charles Logan we saw a few seasons back. He needs that beard! The nutrients its whiskers were absorbing from the sun light were the only thing keeping him sane.

Wait, why do the evil Russians want to stop supporting the peace treaty? Well, there’s the reason they give President Taylor and the real reason. The reason they give is that they don’t support replacing the now dead fake-Iran President with his fake-Iran Wife as the new fake-Iran President. And honestly, if your relatives take over after you die, can you really call yourself a fake-any-country President?

BUT! There’s also the REAL reason they don’t like the peace treaty, and that’s because they never did! HAH! Another great twist! Evil Russia has been the people because the terrorist attacks this whole time.

If only there was some sort of clue that evil Russia was going to be the bad guys. Sigh.

Anyway, the evil Russian gets a call on his iPhone (Remember when people used to pretend they could predict who was a traitor based on whether they used an Apple or PC computer? Ha!) It’s his assassin! Turns out the assassin thinks Renee, Jack’s current fling, recognized him from her time undercover with the Russian mob. Well, the assassin follows them home. Watches them have sex at 8:00 AM. Then shoots Renee.

Renee’s been through a lot since last season. She’s violated all her beliefs and tortured people for information, she lost her job, she was raped and beaten by a Russian mobster, and she was just running around and getting shot at all night. So, after getting a short time of happiness with Jack, the writers of 24 mercifully let her die quick and painlessly.

Oh no wait. Actually she dies slowly and in a great deal of pain. While naked! At least Jack now has a reason to stick around and finish the season.

The reason: revenge!

Twenty-foursight: A women fake-Iran President? Fake-Iran is a lot more liberal than real Iran.

Tags: 24, This Week on 24