Zombie Factories On The Moon – JLA #14

The cover to JLA #14
Nobody told Darkseid he’s allowed to retake that Drivers License photo if he isn’t happy with the first attempt.

From Series: JLA (Vol 1)

What Happened:

It’s fifteen years in the future and the time displaced Aquaman (Arthur Curry), Green Lantern (Kyle Rayner), and The Flash (Wally West) have joined forces with the last remaining heroes on an Earth conquered by Darkseid. The plan is to undo Darkseid’s conquest by returning to the past. There, the JLAer’s can stop Superman (Clark Kent) from destroying Lex Luthor’s Philosopher’s Stone which begins the chain of events ending with Darkseid in charge.

The plan is also to blow up the zombie factory on the moon because zombie factories are never a good thing.

Black Racer, the New God of Death, is observing the whole thing from the shadows because this is NOT GOING TO WORK OUT.

Azteka and Argent (Toni Monetti) lead the assault on the Zombie factory. Argent figures out a new way to use her powers after a conversation with Green Lantern. This helps them a little bit but Argent is still fatally wounded by a blast from one of the factory’s guards. So Azteka turns off a switch on his armor that keeps the whole thing from blowing up in a catastrophic explosion. Why is that a switch? Shouldn’t that at the very least be a lock? Or maybe two switches? What if Azteka bumps a coffee table the wrong way? Boom?

This seems like poor super hero costume design.

Also, seconds ago we saw the heroes watching innocent humans being separated in the factory from their families. This upsets the heroes a lot! So they blow every one in the factory up? Problem solved? I guess. It did technically remove the problem.

Back on Earth, Batman (Bruce Wayne) uses his disguise as the Darkseid’s assistant Desaad to ambush him and the Grandmother Box with the remaining heroes. He tricks Metron like Tom Sawyer to become human for a minute so Batman can knock him out and steal his time traveling chair. Then he sends The Flash, Green Lantern, and Aquaman back home to fix the timeline. Batman and Wonder Woman (Diana of Themyscira) die fighting Darkseid. Green Arrow (Connor Hawke) and The Atom (Ray Palmer) die killing Darkseid.

Then Orion, decides to destroy the whole reality because honestly do we need another alternate future? No! Scrap it!

What I Learned From This Comic:

Metron would make for a great little brother.

The Creators:
Writer: Grant Morrison
Pencils: Howard Porter
Inker: John Dell
Colorist: Pat Garrahy
Separations: Heroic Age
Letterer: Ken Lopez
Editors: Dan Raspler and Peter Tomasi

JLA #13

The cover to JLA (Vol 1) #13
Multiple pupils, so you can’t tell who’s dress the Martian Manhunter is looking down. What a creep.

From Series: JLA (Vol 1)

What Happened:

When Aquaman (Arthur Curry), The Flash (Wally West), and Green Lantern (Kyle Rayner) returned from deep space they had to travel the speed of light to do this. Something went wrong though and when they arrived on Earth they got there 15 years too late. They all get zapped into their older bodies which have spent 15 years on an Earth conquered by Darkseid.

Aquaman is one of the few heroes left. He’s a little dazed after finding himself in a much older body. After joining a battle with Wonder Woman (Diana of Themyscira) he gets all the kinks out and back into the swing of things. Most of the Earth’s population have been turned into mindless servants of Darkseid. So the two of them are fighting a losing war.

They manage to escape Darkseid’s forcing through the sewer and meet with a depowered and formally brainwashed Green Lantern. Green Lantern in this future became a brainwashed soldier of Darkseid but his past self getting zapped into his future body freed him. The Flash is worse off. The will of his older self has been broken and cut off from the Speed Force, his source of power. So he’s stuck unable to help and unable to use his powers to travel back into the past. This leaves only one way to go back in time and stop Darkseid before he takes over the Earth: they have to use Darkseid’s own time travel technology.

Waaaaiiit… If Darkseid has time travel technology couldn’t he just go back even FURTHER and undo their undo-ing of his doing? NO SSSSTTOOOPP THINKING ABOUT ITTTT!! BRAAAAIIINNN, YOUUU’RREE HEEADING FORRR A CLIIFFFFF!

In this future Superman (Clark Kent) died. He took his own life after he was forced to mercy kill his wife Lois Lane. Martian Manhunter (J’onn J’onzz) was tortured to death by Darkseid’s minions. Batman (Bruce Wayne) was captured by Darkseid’s servant Desaad and never heard from again. THINGS ARE GRIM. The remaining JLA-ers, who Green Lantern has no problem disrespecting… even though he has no powers… and it his future self joined the bad-guys, are outgunned.

Fortunately, Desaad’s base is completely unguarded. They break in without any problems! What a stroke of luck. In the base they find Batman in charge. Batman? Turns out he has been posing as Desaad for the last two months (Batman defeated him in an unsubscribed “battle of wits”).

With Batman back to help them things are starting to get just a little less oppressively hopeless until they realize Darkseid has already arrived and intends to speed up Earth’s destruction.

What I Learned From This Comic:

Green Lantern really became a diva after he joined the JLA.

The Creators:
Writer: Grant Morrison
Pencils: Howard Porter
Inker: John Dell
Colorist: Pat Garrahy
Separations: Heroic Age
Letterer: Ken Lopez
Editors: Dan Raspler and Peter Tomasi