The People You Are Not – Phonogram: The Singles Club #5

The cover to Phonogram: The Singles Club #5
Not sure what this is advertising but I’m listening…

From Series: Phonogram: The Singles Club

What Happened:

Laura Heaven feels bad and you should too. So you will. Because she is a magic person.

Laura Heaven is a phonomancer (person who can use music for magic) but got the short end of the stick when it comes to fantastical powers. While her friend Penny B can charm nearly anyone with her dancing, Laura is just a concoction of all the music and pop culture she has taken in. She constantly quotes her favorite band The Long Blondes both in conversation and in narration. This makes her less of an original flavor of taffy and more of a smooshed ball of all the taffy flavors she enjoys.

Probably the biggest bummer of all, Laura is self aware enough to recognize and hate these limitations in herself. Not restricted to self hatred though, Laura turns her cynical eye on everyone in her life. Most of all on her best friend Penny. Penny is happy, loved by all, and charming. Laura hides her self-cutting and insecurities with long sleeves and sarcasm. Best friends don’t always make sense.

Their night is laser focused on getting Penny and her newly-single crush Marquis to dance and hook up at the club. Penny’s phonomancer powers come from dancing, so she’s pretty confident about her chances with Marquis in the dance club. Laura willfully (but not excitedly) goes along with the plan while feeling like no one would ever pick her for a dance/hook-up/conversation. She considers herself the perpetual “second choice”. And hey, look at that, another bummer because Laura wants to get with everyone at the club. Everyone.

This neediness depresses her.

Depression may have many cures but I was surprised to learn running into Dark Aster in the bathroom was one of them. Aster, the probably-evil-but-we-love-her-anyway phonomancer Coven leader sees Laura for who she really is and does not judge her. Aster laughs at Laura’s posturing and lets her know “You’re a bad person. That’s not so bad.” This alleviates some of Laura’s need to be like Penny, some of her need to be like anyone else, and all of her need for other people.

After everyone at the club has coupled up and gone home, Laura and Lloyd (Logos) share a taxi. Lloyd being Marquis hanger-on gives Laura a sense of camaraderie. When he tells her his plans for a band and she deduces that he’s about to ask her to be the singer. She also realizes she would be his second choice and then she surprises them both by leaving the taxi, with new magic forming in her eyes.

What I Learned From this Issue:

Quoting the movie Airplane to people can result in profanity.

The Creators:
Writer: Kieron Gillen
Penciler/Inker/Letterer: Jamie McKelvie
Colorist: Matthew Wilson